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| Friday, May 23, 2008 |
| Confiteor Ex Animo: Tribute To The Man |
| I've rarely talked about my hub-a-lot. Yes, I am not married to myself, mind you! I did manage to snag a special somebody from the meager few who looked my way. It goes way back to being online buddies in 2001, to finally being dubbed as a "couple" both online and in real life. Fast forward around 6 years to the Present: married, spawned (twice!), and still inexplicably complicated. Truly a feat! Here goes a meme that plowed through my brain. In good timing, of course, as this might be something that I owe The Man for a long time. Mommy Ruby tagged/dared me to brag about my hubby. If he's reading this right now, I bet his first thought would be, "she wont have anything to brag about when it comes to me.." Au contraire, Ten, when it comes to you, I've got a lot to brag about... Allow me to talk (and brag a bit) about The Man.
Tribute to The Man 
The Man's name is Richard O. Tecson, 25 years of age (turning 26 on the 5th of June, 2008). Ten, as what I call him these days, is obsessed with soccer and basketball (like me). His obsession leads to countless nights of no sleep because he is either playing Football Manager 2007 or watching soccer on TV. He's got this programming in his mind that allows him to store a whole lot of knowledge on soccer and basketballs stats, names, dates, and scores. I marvel at his brain, which must have the hard drive capacity of at least 10 Tetrabytes(?). He can memorize not only stats regarding sports, but of famous people as well, and of history and breakthroughs. On top of that, he is greatly interested in war - which means he knows weapons and their capacity. He knows who shot who and who fired what in whatever year it was. Things I have no idea about. In contrast to my brain capacity, I think logically I can compete, mathematically, I might be a step higher, but with regards to memory use, I have no idea. I have short term memory loss. HeHeHe.. Ten loves to read, and his readings are not limited to or consist of what men call reading materials, i.e., FHM, PlayBoy, Tech, and all that other stuff. Nope. He reads John Grisham, is rather obsessed with Tolkien and all his books (he remembers dates, places, names, and other stuff regarding Tolkien), Anne Rice, etc., and he goes through my Smithsonian monthly subscription more than I do. His musical tastes range from alternative to hard rock, from reggae to RnB, the RnB (reggae nga bisaya) and at some point he becomes a sentimental sap. He also loves the computer as much as he loves me - I think. If there is a computer game, a PlayStation, or an xBox around, let's just say his hands get all itchy as he craves to even try. In fact, when we were dating, he and I used to play PlayStation 2 every afternoon as soon as my classes end. We also both love to eat, walk around the boulevard, and just talk. Suffice it to say that our interests are almost the same. On top of all that, he doesn't even have all the time in the world to do everything, really, because he The Man. Yes, he was kind enough to put his dreams, his aspirations, his "guy time" and his pride to the side by willingly offering that he stay at home with the kids while I go out and gallivant, ehrrr I mean, provide. If I had been the one to stay full-time, it would have been okay, too. But for the sake of others, he was the one willing to compromise. Not only does he take care of the kiddies, he takes good care of me, too. In most cases, he and my friends agree that I drive myself down to the ground. And yes, they gang up on me, too! On top of that, he keeps pushing me to spend time with my friends when the occasion permits. Perhaps he is the most understanding guy I have ever known - save for a few diva moments or so. Hehe Right, Ten? One thing I was worried about (or still am, especially these days) is that if he leaves me. You know how sometimes men tend to stray especially if the wife is too busy. Even when we were still dating, I could not help but be a bit cautious with my heart. I do trust him not to stray. But a wife/girlfriend cannot help it if women display themselves or openly flirt with men. And I have seen women flirt with him in front of me even. But I never let my jealousy show. I've learned to just keep it cool. Surprisingly, he never has strayed - so far. Even his friends say that they've tried to get him to even just flirt with a girl, but he just doesn't show that much interest. And for that, he has earned their respect on that level. Now, they are more open with me, and I trust them as much as I trust him. Admittedly, there is a lot more to him. There are other things about him that I would like to keep to myself. Something which I often do. But this time around, I chose to talk about him a bit more as a lot of people tend to be a bit prejudiced with their impressions about him. A lot are confused as to why I fell for him. I do have my reasons, and if you know me more intimately, from what I shared above, I think you might be able to see why.
A toast to a Wonderful Dad, and a Loving Husband! Thank you for everything, Ten!! Payce! Ex animo,
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{Start Copy Here}
Rules: 1) Copy from {Start Copy Here} to {End Copy Here}.
2) Blog Brag about your husband - yes, the father of your child/ren. As I’ve said singles may also join by bragging about their own fathers, or even grandfathers. It doesn’t matter! Of course, Daddy bloggers themselves may also join, but you have to blog about your fathers and not about yourselves, deal? Okay. Good.
3) Add your blog in the masterlist below linking to the post that you just made. Or if you wish, do it as how I’ve done it in my other blog by adding a new page.
4) Leave some love here. Yup. Here. Thanks!
5) Let’s not forget Peppermint Creative for the corner border I used for the badge. 6) Lastly, let’s help each other by copying and updating the list of participants in your post. Come and visit once in a while for the benefit of the late comers who have also joined this meme.
Masterlist
When Silence Speaks | Everything About Deye | Etc Atbp | Pinay Mommy Online | Never Dainty | YOU ARE NEXT Labels: marriage, meme, men, personal matters, tributes |
| posted by Ann @ 6:19 PM
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| Saturday, May 3, 2008 |
| How to Help a Marriage or Relationship Survive |
It is a shame how so many marriages start so quickly, only to end as quick as it started. In the United States alone, dissolving a marriage or separation is as easy as 1, 2, and 3. While in the Philippines, it may not be as quick to annul or divorce your spouse, but it has become easy just to turn your back and leave.
Hey, I may not know these from personal experience, i.e., my marriage itself, but I have seen too many broken marriages that I wonder at my guts by still pushing through marriage when I should be traumatized by now. Even my childhood friend suffered the same fate. Got married 9 months into a relationship (no, bride was not pregnant), and in a year or so, marriage evolved into an on-and-off one, and now, after 2 years, SEPARATION.
The possibility of it happening to my marriage scares me a lot. As much as I try to brush these thoughts out of my mind, I must admit there have been many nights where I've lain awake trying to conjure up ways to make this precious relationship last. In my mind's eye, I have made a list of do's and don'ts but I still cannot be sure if this really works.
There is this other list though, which I found in Zen Habits. Leo's (of Zen Habits) ideas somewhat coincide with what I had in mind. His points in his Seven Deadly Sins of a Relationship are as follows, as well as my comments:
- Resentment - This one is something like a small dose of rat poison in your food. It kills your relationship little by little through the small resentments you have. If you do not let the small things go, little by little, it builds and one day it would just blow up without your partner knowing anything about it.
- Jealousy - Nothing is worse than letting jealousy eat you up inside. Although, admittedly it would be nice if your special someone was jealous once in a while. But do not take it to the next level by being too driven by it. It could definitely ruin a relationship.
- Unrealistic expectations - People are people. Despite what you think your special someone SHOULD be, do not expect too much. A little surprise never hurt anybody, and if you set your expectations too high from the person, you end up feeling let down, and you do not have anybody else to blame other than yourself.
- Not making time - This, I believe is one of the usual culprits of broken marriages. In the quest to provide for the family, a spouse, or both, could spend so much time doing other things to the extent that he or she no longer has the strength or time to spend on his or her own family. And to be honest, this is what I fear the most. Spending time with your whole family is different from spending one on one time with your significant other. Omit this one, and *poof!* next thing you know your boats are drifting apart.
- Lack of communication - Communication is a MUST in ALL forms of relationships. Everybody has misunderstandings and small fights, but if there is lack of communication, there is a lack of clarification or letting out of emotions which in turn could add to the brewing battle of wills.
- Not showing your gratitude - Even the simplest of things can make or break a relationship. Showing your gratitude by appreciating even the minute things done for you or the blessings that have come can definitely strengthen a relationship. Not showing your gratitude can often make your partner feel like his oer her efforts were nothing, or that you did not even notice the things done for you.
- Lack of affection - No duh! Lack of affection = lack of anything. While the song "all we need is love.." is not exactly true, a marriage/partnership/relationship MUST have some form of affection. Right? Or else!
Leo's post took the words right from my mouth. Of course, he would have more authority talking about what to do because he has gone through marriage twice! Me? Oh, I am just a n00b. But I hope to grow old with... YOU!
XOXO,
Labels: good finds, how to, improvement, marriage, personal matters, relationships, tips |
| posted by Ann @ 11:23 AM
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| About Me |
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Name: Ann
Home: Philippines
About Me: even when she has fairy wings on, this girl is anything BUT dainty. perhaps the size, the weight, and the personality alone are just too much for her to be considered delicate, prim, proper, and refined. this girl with the mud smudged cheeks has been down on the ground one to many times. these times forced her to be tougher, smarter, and more savvy than she has ever been. perhaps she will always be, never dainty.
email me: neverdainty [at] gmail [dot] com
See my complete profile
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